By TOSIN AJIRIRE
 |
| American TV star Stacie Turner |
American TV star Stacie Turner last week made an epoch making trip to Nigeria in search of her long lost father, Mr. Nze Augustine Onyema. She opened up to Blockbuster while waiting to board Arik Air back to the US, at the Murtala Muhammed International Airport, Lagos on Tuesday night. 42-year-old Stacie recalls how it all went. Enjoy:
The search
I started the search for my father nine years ago when my son was born and I was diagnosed with sickle cell traits. And I said it’s interesting to find out my medical history because I always knew I was adopted. All of a sudden because of this medical history I was curious who my parents were for the first time. So, I wrote the adoption agency to try and get my medical information. They didn’t have it but instead they sent me a summary of who my parents were.
And it was the first time I found out that my birth mother was of German/Finish descent and my father was of Nigerian descent. As I grew up with my family, I always thought that I was African-American not knowing I had these other nationalities in my background that I didn’t know anything about. And so I came to Nigeria out of curiousity to find out more about my father.
I started the search for my father nine years ago when my son was born and I was diagnosed with sickle cell traits. And I said it’s interesting to find out my medical history because I always knew I was adopted. All of a sudden because of this medical history I was curious who my parents were for the first time. So, I wrote the adoption agency to try and get my medical information. They didn’t have it but instead they sent me a summary of who my parents were.
And it was the first time I found out that my birth mother was of German/Finish descent and my father was of Nigerian descent. As I grew up with my family, I always thought that I was African-American not knowing I had these other nationalities in my background that I didn’t know anything about. And so I came to Nigeria out of curiousity to find out more about my father.
Face to face with dad
Meeting face to face with my father is indescribable. Though, I initially found him in April 2010 when I first contacted him on phone. Since then we had talked on phone a number of times but the network was always bad, and because of the dialect we couldn’t really have a conversation. But finally seeing him on that day was completely overwhelming for both of us. He was completely open and welcoming. The moment was incredible. I found out that I have 10 siblings. I grew up as an only child and never thought I have all these relatives, which is a wonderful thing.
Meeting face to face with my father is indescribable. Though, I initially found him in April 2010 when I first contacted him on phone. Since then we had talked on phone a number of times but the network was always bad, and because of the dialect we couldn’t really have a conversation. But finally seeing him on that day was completely overwhelming for both of us. He was completely open and welcoming. The moment was incredible. I found out that I have 10 siblings. I grew up as an only child and never thought I have all these relatives, which is a wonderful thing.
Screaming and crying
The moment we both met, I was speechless. My father was screaming and crying. I also started crying. We didn’t say anything to each other. Emotion was just overflowing. He just kept looking at me like ‘is it real? Are we really here? Originally, I didn’t want to come looking for him because my birth mother had said the experience would bring him shame. But fortunately, we have some good friends in the United States who are travelling with us. For my husband’s best friend who is a Nigerian it’s like ‘oh, that’s ridiculous. It’s not part of our culture not to seek out your family’. I am so happy that I decided to pursue it. What my husband’s friend said turned out to be true because the entire family completely embraced us.
The moment we both met, I was speechless. My father was screaming and crying. I also started crying. We didn’t say anything to each other. Emotion was just overflowing. He just kept looking at me like ‘is it real? Are we really here? Originally, I didn’t want to come looking for him because my birth mother had said the experience would bring him shame. But fortunately, we have some good friends in the United States who are travelling with us. For my husband’s best friend who is a Nigerian it’s like ‘oh, that’s ridiculous. It’s not part of our culture not to seek out your family’. I am so happy that I decided to pursue it. What my husband’s friend said turned out to be true because the entire family completely embraced us.
What dad told me
My father told me I am Ada, meaning I am his first daughter and eldest child. He also said he had regrets because he lost so much time. I then told him there’s no need for regrets, and that everything started anew from the day we both met. And that I’m quite happy to be home. What was so nice when we met was that my father gave my children and I Igbo names. The second thing he said after we embraced was that he has renamed my children and me. He named me Chimaobi, which means God has answered my desires. My son, Jacob was named Ugonna, meaning father’s pride, and my daughter, Catherine he named Ngozi, meaning blessing. We were hosted by so many people every single day. We were hosted by former Governor Achike Udenwa. We ate Nigerian food everyday of the week and I love it. Our favourites are goat head pepper soup (Isi Ewu) and fufu.
My father told me I am Ada, meaning I am his first daughter and eldest child. He also said he had regrets because he lost so much time. I then told him there’s no need for regrets, and that everything started anew from the day we both met. And that I’m quite happy to be home. What was so nice when we met was that my father gave my children and I Igbo names. The second thing he said after we embraced was that he has renamed my children and me. He named me Chimaobi, which means God has answered my desires. My son, Jacob was named Ugonna, meaning father’s pride, and my daughter, Catherine he named Ngozi, meaning blessing. We were hosted by so many people every single day. We were hosted by former Governor Achike Udenwa. We ate Nigerian food everyday of the week and I love it. Our favourites are goat head pepper soup (Isi Ewu) and fufu.
Coming back
I have a strong desire to come back really quickly. We are planning to come back in July. We are bringing along the children and we’ll be here for a month. We were here for only eight days. We were in Owerri for three days and also in Abuja and Lagos for a few days. Everything went so fast. I am looking forward to being able to go back to Mbatoili and spend time with the family, and have my kids to start to learn the culture and be part of the community. We were given great traditional attires. We also had local and high fashion outfits from top designers in the country. I don’t see us coming to settle finally in Nigeria. Our plan is to commune between Nigeria and the US. In fact, we plan to come back in the summer and then visit every year. We want to change the misconception about Nigeria in America. People always have negative stuffs about the country. We hope to educate people about what Nigeria is really like. From our experience, the perception is wonderfully different. We love the richness of the culture and tradition, the mutual respect that the people have for each other and the hospitality are so overwhelming.
I have a strong desire to come back really quickly. We are planning to come back in July. We are bringing along the children and we’ll be here for a month. We were here for only eight days. We were in Owerri for three days and also in Abuja and Lagos for a few days. Everything went so fast. I am looking forward to being able to go back to Mbatoili and spend time with the family, and have my kids to start to learn the culture and be part of the community. We were given great traditional attires. We also had local and high fashion outfits from top designers in the country. I don’t see us coming to settle finally in Nigeria. Our plan is to commune between Nigeria and the US. In fact, we plan to come back in the summer and then visit every year. We want to change the misconception about Nigeria in America. People always have negative stuffs about the country. We hope to educate people about what Nigeria is really like. From our experience, the perception is wonderfully different. We love the richness of the culture and tradition, the mutual respect that the people have for each other and the hospitality are so overwhelming.
On Nollywood
I am very familiar with Nollywood. I have had the opportunity of watching a few Nigerian movies, and planning to see more. I have also read about Nollywood in your newspaper, The Sun. In fact, we brought along some film crew to film the entire trip. The footage is unbelievable. We were originally thinking that the producers of the television series I am featuring currently, The Real Housewives of DC will use the footage but it’s so much deeper and richer than what we ever imagined. We are seeing it as a feature film and it will absolutely come to Nollywood.
I am very familiar with Nollywood. I have had the opportunity of watching a few Nigerian movies, and planning to see more. I have also read about Nollywood in your newspaper, The Sun. In fact, we brought along some film crew to film the entire trip. The footage is unbelievable. We were originally thinking that the producers of the television series I am featuring currently, The Real Housewives of DC will use the footage but it’s so much deeper and richer than what we ever imagined. We are seeing it as a feature film and it will absolutely come to Nollywood.
On Arik
Arik Airline has been wonderful to us. We have flown first class and given first class treatment. Arik staff have been attentive and we consider them as partners. We hope they will be partners in some charity efforts that we have. I run a charity organization called Extra-Ordinary Life where I provide exposure to girls in foster care, and we do that through travel. Last year, we took some girls to South Africa during the World Cup. In the summer of 2012, we are planning to bring a group of girls down to Nigeria. We hope Arik Airline will give us the necessary support.
Arik Airline has been wonderful to us. We have flown first class and given first class treatment. Arik staff have been attentive and we consider them as partners. We hope they will be partners in some charity efforts that we have. I run a charity organization called Extra-Ordinary Life where I provide exposure to girls in foster care, and we do that through travel. Last year, we took some girls to South Africa during the World Cup. In the summer of 2012, we are planning to bring a group of girls down to Nigeria. We hope Arik Airline will give us the necessary support.
Stacie’s hubby, Jason, also speaks:
The whole trip was just a blessing from God. There were lots of coincidences. When we were boarding Arik Air, one of the greatest partners that we had, from Lagos to Owerri, we noticed that it had the name, Augustine boldly inscribed on it. And of course, that’s the name of Stacie’s birth father. So, it means the plane, Augustine is taking us to see Augustine that’s Stacie’s father
The whole trip was just a blessing from God. There were lots of coincidences. When we were boarding Arik Air, one of the greatest partners that we had, from Lagos to Owerri, we noticed that it had the name, Augustine boldly inscribed on it. And of course, that’s the name of Stacie’s birth father. So, it means the plane, Augustine is taking us to see Augustine that’s Stacie’s father
Stacie continues: The second coincidence was that we were hosted by former Governor Udenwa and his wife, who had made a dress for me to wear but it was too big. So, it happened that Stella, who’s working with the Nigerian embassy in Washington DC and who was travelling with us, had given me a dress back in the US. So, since the dress given to me by the former governor’s wife didn’t fit, I wore this other dress.
When we walked into the village, we noticed that all the women and members of my family that turned out to welcome us were wearing exactly the same fabric I was wearing. The third coincidence was when we were hosted by the Eze of the village; he gave a chair each to my husband and I to seat. On top of the chair that Jason, my husband sat was inscribed ‘TPM’. To the villagers, that was the initials of the former ruler. But TPM happens to be my husband’s company’s name in the US. It was so coincidental and incredible. All these coincidences let us know that it was God’s doing that I came home to meet my father after so many years.
No comments:
Post a Comment